Last night, Andy excelled himself. He's gone and moved away from legs and is now concentrating on toes.

All we were doing at the pub, was having a chat and a drink and were talking about TV last night. I didn't actually see the programme, but it seems there was a programme on BBC1 which was about nurses in the First World War who were treating soldiers near the front line. In one scene, one of the nurses were told she had to clean up a load of bandages which were bloodied due to use on the soldiers after all, in those days the bandages weren't disposable and you had to reuse them. I suppose if that's all you had then hygiene was a secondary importance.

But anyway, the nurse was happily cleaning up all the bandages as well as using the mangle to drive them but all of a sudden some toes just fell on the floor. I suppose at some time in either surgery or just in general treatment the digits were lost from the poor sod who had been injured.

What a sad scenes, I suppose. Especially as when the nurse spoke to another person about it they just said to incinerate the toes because, after all, they're not going to use them any more.

And it was describing the scene, or drinking his Guinness and at the end he made the remark "I wonder how this soldier is going to wear his toe rings when it summer". Sure, in complete bad taste which I suppose you expect from andy that they you have it, is not going to change now after being a wally all of his life.

Anyway, I think I'll have to I play the programme is it supposed to be very good. The First World War is of interest to me although, I must admit, I still don't quite understand why it started in the first place. Sure, grand Duke Ferdinand or whatever his name was was assassinated but is that really enough reason to send millions of men to fight in the trenches on the fields to be maimed, crippled and killed?

All the best, and if anyone has a message for me to pass on to Andy then let me know and I'll do it. No threats of violence, please!

Note:  The program was called "The Crimson Field".

What's a foot?

I am quite surprised that you have to ask. It's that funny looking thing on the end of your leg which has those with little things connected to them I believe they are called toe.

Perhaps a better question would be' what is the website that is called what a foot about?'

Good question, my friend.

But we haven't really got an answer for you and to be honest I think that we are going to be making things up as we go along. Hopefully that won't be a problem, after all our politicians have been doing it forever.

I was out last night having a drink with some friends and we got talking about some things. It was a little alcohol fuelled (on the best conversations, though?) And we got talking about what part of your body could you do without most.

Most of us said sensible things for example appendix, earlobe or even belly button.

But Andy, in his wisdom, said his foot.

We were quite surprised about that and to hide our shock, we decided to have another pint each.  When that was sorted out we asked Andy why he could do without his foot.

He said if he didn't have a foot then you wouldn't have to do things like buy socks, shoes or athlete's foot remedy.  A good point, we were saying to try make him  feel a bit better, but what about little things like walking, climbing ladders or bouncing on pogo sticks?

No problem, Andy said.  Just get yourself a space hopper and it bounced down the road as a mode of transport. You didn't need a whole feet, stumps would do and you're sorted.

Sometimes we wonder about Andy but is a good bloke, and he buys his rounds so what more can you ask of a friend?